E-cigarettes face new restrictions

A satirical look at smoking and e-cigarettes …….

Strike a Light

We condemn all the smokers
who splutter and choke us
and though it’s now safe
in all public space
where we’re breathing clean air,
and that’s only fair,
here’s a view that it’s all ….. hocus-pocus.
For a mo’ let us focus
on those smokers who choke us
and pay with their lives.
They pay through the nose,
and the lungs and the heart,
wherever the killer smoke goes.
Yes, they pay through the nose
for the hit that they get
from each cigarette
and yet ……..
we know where the money goes.

Strike a light!!
There’s a fight underway.
The e-cigarette
should be a safe bet –
no carcinogens, tobacco-y tars,
smoke them in public, theatres and bars,
socially clean, just a glow to be seen,
just a nicotine fix all the way through.
Yes, the e-cigarette should be safer for you,
and yet …….
the government’s got in a stew.

It just can’t relax.
The e-cigarette is removing its tax,
attacking a source of immense revenue.
Twelve billion a year
or around eight per cent
of our current annual debt.
Now do you get it?
In only ten years we’d triple our debt
losing the cynical tax that we get
from tobacco, cigars and each cigarette.

The government announces with regret:
to us it is clear
that the e-cigarette
may be no panacea.
We don’t want to confuse
but there may be abuse
by those who produce it,
inducing harm
in smokers who use it.

This isn’t time for procrastination.
The e-cigarette is a ‘medication’
and has to suffer regulation.
No word of a lie,
it has to comply
with pharmaceutical laws.
That’ll put back the cause
and that’ll kill sales
and the revenue men
are on track again
with the tax on those who inhale.

12th June 2013

Notes:  “E-cigarettes face new restrictions.”  .  The Medicines and Healthcare Products Regulatory Agency says it will regulate e-cigarettes as medicines when new European tobacco laws come into force from 2016.  Sales of tobacco-free cigarettes have boomed worldwide since bans on smoking in public places were introduced.  Research suggests around 1.3m smokers and ex-smokers in the UK use the products, which are designed to replicate smoking behaviour without the use of tobacco.  Campaigners say the growing popularity of e-cigarettes could undermine years of anti-smoking efforts, with particular concerns about promotion to children and non-smokers.  Manufacturers of e-cigarettes say that, with someone dying from tobacco use every 5 minutes in this country alone, the products can potentially save lives and should not be restricted.


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